Dear February

Dear February,

I really missed you February. You have always been the sign of growth and renewal and this year has provided space for that. I am in the process of healing from a cold winter, and your spring time has offered me a warm embrace, welcoming me once again.

This time four years ago I started my blog. To celebrate my Four year blog-a-versary I wrote and published a post each day. And February, the feedback to it has been absolutely incredible. I have gained more followers in this month than I have in the past four, and I’ve received so many wonderful comments that I can hardly keep up with them. My readers have helped me to heal just as much as you have February. I don’t think I could thank either of you enough.

Of course there was some dark clouds this month, but only a couple. Some days were more gloomy than others, but you are just the beginning of a new year. This may not seem too significant, but I feel I have put myself out there more and started to allow myself to be okay. To be honest with you February, I was probably more upset this month than usual. That probably contrasts to everything I just said. But I didn’t mind. It was so much better than just feeling numb. I allowed myself to get out anything I wanted to because I knew sunshine would come the next morning. I was able to relax because I had trust in you to welcome and comfort me each day I needed it February.

Personally, I thought I helped others to grow this month. I made myself more available to those who I knew would do the same for me. I started to talk more to those around me who felt like I had closed them off. I encouraged people to work together and now I have a core group of class friends who I can really rely on in my most crucial part of my degree.
February, you helped me to realise that I grow most when I’m watering others.

I need to thank everyone who has not been annoyed by my blog showing up in their reader each day. I need to thank any new followers who took the time to make my day a bit brighter by clicking a button. I need to thank anyone who stumbled across my little space here on the internet.

I need to thank you, February. You were there when I needed you most. You always have been.

All my love,
Eimear
(P.S. I can’t wait to see you again)

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Wish for you

It’s funny how
I have no expectations
But my heart still stops
Only to speed up again
When I get a glimpse of you
Sparking a moment of hope
That I know will never last
No matter how long
I really want to believe it
This control over me
Is painful
So I spend my life
Wishing it away
When I really want to wish for you

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Maybe One Day

Maybe if I don’t go to sleep tonight
Tomorrow won’t come
I won’t have to think of what will happen
Despite willing what I want to happen

My fear will leave
The sun will shine
But I keep waiting
For the moments to pass

I’ll stay awake
Until I can
Staying safe
From all the things I’m thinking about

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(P.S. I accidentally published the wrong draft today lol soz email readers)

The year we found ourselves

The year we found ourselves
My eyes were open
My heart was strong
And I was happy

The summer air
Made it easy to breathe
Filling each moment
With sunshine and happiness

The darkest cloud
Could not prevent
The radiating happiness
In everyone around us

I never knew I was so young in the world
And my eyes were opened again
The year we found ourselves
Was really the year we found each other

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I wish I could do more

Each moment that I can
I’ll give you my everything

Without hesitating
Or being asked
I’ll do the dishes
Or hoover somewhere

If it saves you a moment
That you’ll choose
To put into something else
Probably to help me

I wish I could give you more
Because you have given me everything
Without ever asking
Or asking for appreciation

I’ll try to help
But it will never be enough
To thank you for everything

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Pinterest Appreciation

I never really realised how much I used Pinterest until I started recommending it to people. Originally, I was only on it to follow people and get photos. However, somehow it has become one of my favourite apps. It became my sort of “wind down app” before bed.. if that makes sense.

I don’t have the pressure of being “online” like facebook, nor do I have to engage in much like tumblr or youtube. But on Pinterest, I can just scroll and save pretty things. It’s nice.

Recently, I’ve been trying to pay attention to my nutrition intake and my pinterest board had helped me by just being able to refer to it.

It is also filled with endless writing prompts... which is pretty fun.

One day in class my teacher asked who used Pinterest, and no one put their hand up. It was a majority male class so I didn’t want to be the only one to admit to even knowing what this website was. But I’m not ashamed!

Pinterest appreciation! 

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House Fairies

Fairies have always been a popular creature in Ireland with Irish folklore. I’ve grown up with different interpretations of fairies, and visited many of the different landmarks around Ireland that cater to the fairy folk.

My dad used to bring me home any book he could get his hands on because he knew, just like him, I would read anything. He would buy from charity shops and practically bring the same books back the next day to donate again. To this day I still think it’s the best way to read as many books as possible. So although I can’t thank him for bringing home the greatest literature of the century, I can always thank him for bringing me the love of reading as much as possible. I enjoyed all the books of course, but it was mostly light reading that could be read and passed on.

For my mum, reading was a very different experience. She would never read something that she knew she wouldn’t enjoy and would stop reading a book if it bored her or if anything else bothered her about it. However, she is responsible for introducing me to some of my favourite books that will always stay with me. My dad never knew what to pick out for me, which broadened my types of novels I read. But my mum knew what to look for and every once in a while she would arrive home with a book that would capture my heart.

One of these books was about a ‘faery’ named  Knife. Researching it today for this post, I discovered it was only the beginning of a series called Faery Rebels.  I had never heard of the book or author when I first got it, but it intrigued me so much. My “reading ego” was a bit high, so I wasn’t too impressed when my mum brought me a book that I had never heard of before, but after reading it I was almost mad at myself for almost being too stubborn to read it. Looking back on it, it probably does have a weird story line that wouldn’t stand out to me now. But it was just something completely different to anything I had ever read before.

I raved about it a lot to anyone who would listen, and got all of my friends interested in this mysterious new book. Although I never had the “fairy phase” growing up of Irish folklore or pretty little colourful fairies, I had a new understanding of them.

Also, it became a joke in my house that everything that happened was because of the group of faeries now living in the house. To this day we would refer to the “Water Faery” who never returns water bottles to the kitchen, or the “Shoe Faery” who steals my mothers shoes that conveniently always end up in my bedroom…

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